TRAVELER
(Written on the road between Colorado and California
in the summer of 1994 – my theme song)

I am a pilgrim and a traveler
And I love the journey like I love my home
On the open highway, in the wild high desert
In the cool green mountains I never feel alone

Sometimes I travel a long time alone
The wild my only companion
Night after night in the pale starlight
I see that the road carries on

I am a pilgrim and a traveler
And I love the journey like I love my home
On the open highway, in the wild high desert
In the cool green mountains I never feel alone

Sometimes I walk at the side of a friend
Together we find our way
Down roads unused for many long years
Or roads traveled yesterday

There’s beauty in all things around me
Life that I don’t always see
I walk in darkness till a sudden summer rain
Washes the blindness from me

I carry inside me the seeds of my home
Plant them wherever I can
In wide open spaces and wild open hearts
In the touch of a loving hand

I am a pilgrim and a traveler
And I love the journey like I love my home
On the open highway, in the wild high desert
In the cool green mountains I never feel alone
The journey is my home

Ellen: vocals, guitar, cabasa
Smokin’ Joe Kelly: bass, harmony vocals
Randy Utterback: mandolin, dobro
John Michel: drums


CALL THE WIND
(Written in the spring of 1998 at a friend’s dome home
in the forest outside of Pagosa Springs, Colorado)

You must have called the wind, she said, it's never blown like this before
Sounds like someone crying, someone wanting to be heard
Now it's shaking all the trees and breaking off branches
But don't worry, sister, our roots are strong in the earth

Ooh, a change is coming, don't try to hold on
Ooh, this storm that's blowing will soon be gone

The wind is getting wilder now, it's pounding at the windows
Gathers up loose ends and it takes them for a ride
It reaches in your mouth and rips away your words
And it scours through your soul 'til there's nothing left to hide

Ooh, a change is coming, don't try to hold on
Ooh, this storm that's blowing will soon be gone

The wind has called the clouds today to bring their gift of rain to us
They're gathered like a tribe of gods to watch us from on high
There are forces so much larger here than anything we know
Oh, dance with the wind when you hear it call your name

Ooh, a change is coming, don't try to hold on
Ooh, this storm that's blowing will soon be gone



Ellen: guitar, vocal
Smokin’ Joe Kelly: acoustic and electric guitars, bass
Randy Utterback: dobro, mandolin
Steve Johnson: banjo, harmony vocal
Sandy Munro: harmony vocal


HOLY RAIN
(Written in the fall of 2002 in Paonia, Colorado, after the blazing summer. A couple of years earlier, at a rain dance in southern Colorado, the Hopi Elders told us that if the Creator answered our prayers and sent us rain, we should not cover our heads -- that would be putting a barrier between ourselves and the gifts of the Creator. It poured.)

It’s been a long, dry summer and the fires have been raging
The cracked earth cries out in thirst
Clouds pass by, my face stays dry
At last I’m longing for the first

Holy rain, coming down
Fill the sky, heal the ground
Holy rain, wash me clean
So I can hear my heart again

When I read the headlines they are filled with pain
And a world that’s forgotten how to breathe
The war drums pound as if the sound
Could drown the hurt and make the sorrow leave

Holy rain, coming down
Fill the sky, heal the ground
Holy tears, wash me clean
So I can hear my heart again

You can’t know heaven, the wise ones say
If you try to hold hard times away
If you pray for rain, an old one said
When it comes, don’t cover your head

So I pray for courage to stand in the fire
To feel all that life gives
And I pray for tears to wash through my fears
So in love I’ll know how to live

Holy rain, coming down
Fill the sky, heal the ground
Holy tears, wash me clean
So I can hear my heart again
Holy rain, wash me clean
So I can live in love again


Ellen: vocal, guitar
Smokin’ Joe Kelly: bass, bandoneon
Randy Utterback: fiddle
JD Martin, Jan Garrett, Bobby Mason: harmony vocals
Sarah Stevens: answering vocal
John Michel: drums


STAND BY ME
(WHEN THE GROUND GIVES WAY)

I thought I had to say goodbye
Close the door and let these feelings die
I watched you walk away, disappear
Then come back to say that you’re always here
And last night driving home in the full moon
I turned my lights out…the road was bright before me
And it all made sense, clear as day
There’s no defense when the ground gives way

Come take my hand, stand by me
Come help me land on my feet
Come in the night, come when it’s light
And stand by me

I’ve made my share of stupid mistakes
Can you forgive me, can I forgive myself?
It’s such a human thing to try and hide
This longing and this pain inside
Being alive is a wonder and a joy
I see it clearly through this wall of tears
And when I forget you gently say
There’s nothing to protect when the ground gives way

Come take my hand, stand by me
Come help me land on my feet
Come in the night, come when it’s light
And stand by me

There are so many losses where we have no choice
If you were gone tomorrow
I’d be waiting on the wind to hear your voice

I didn’t know I could ask you to stay
I’m down to nothing, I’m empty and I’m raw
Just this open hand, a leap of faith
That we will stand when the ground gives way

Come take my hand, stand by me
Come help me land on my feet
Come in the night, come when it’s light
And stand by me

 

 

 


Ellen: guitar, vocals
Smokin’ Joe Kelly: 12 string guitar, bass, timpani, vocals
JD Martin: piano, vocals
Jan Garrett, Bobby Mason, Sarah Stevens: vocals
John Michel: drums


EXILE

Tell it to me, say it again
This long time of waiting is coming to an end
Well, I never gave up...now I'm giving in
To the comfort of your open skies, no blame for where I've been

Too many years I have wandered
Too many things I thought I had to do
I've been a long while in exile
Now I'm coming back to you

Last night alone in a cabin up high
I stared at the Milky Way splashed across the sky
And I thought I was lost as the wind chilled my bones
The freedom of my emptiness the only thing I owned

Too many years I have wandered
Too many things I thought I had to do
I've been a long while in exile
Now I'm coming back to you

Then a great shooting star fell from the sky
The light from its passing was a flame a thousand miles high
And it showed me the road I've been on so long
Showed me everything I love and gave me back a song

Too many years I have wandered
Too many things I thought I had to do
I've been a long while in exile
Now I'm coming back to you
I've been a long while in exile
Now I'm coming back to you


Ellen: guitar, vocal
Randy Utterback: mandolin
Smokin’ Joe Kelly: guitars, bandoneon, harmony vocals
Bobby Mason: harmony vocals


WALK ON EARTH
(For Julia Butterfly Hill…a most inspiring and down-to-earth woman)

She came to the forest in answer to a call
An Arkansas traveler, bound to see it all
The daughter of a preacher, she learned to speak the truth
And to love all creation on this earth

She did not want to walk on water
She did not try to walk on air
But every day she gave thanks for a greater miracle
To walk on earth...the answer to her prayer

She climbed an ancient redwood to save it from the saw
As the days turned into months turned into years she lived in awe
The storms that came each winter nearly broke her vow
'Til she learned to bend and sway just like the bough

"This was not a planned adventure, I was following my heart
I'm just an ordinary woman trying to do my part
To protect this precious life on earth, the spirit that we share
With all living things of water, land and air

I do not want to walk on water
I do not try to walk on air
But every day I give thanks for a greater miracle
To walk on earth...the answer to my prayer"

There's a gift waiting in each of us to emerge from its cocoon
That's the message of the butterfly and a tree named for the moon
A legacy of hope and change, a reminder to be true
And to seek the best in everyone and all we do

I do not want to walk on water
I do not try to walk on air
But every day I give thanks for a greater miracle
To walk on earth...the answer to my prayer
To walk on earth is the answer to my prayer


Ellen: guitar, vocals
Smokin’ Joe Kelly: bass, guitar, piano
Anders Hyde: violin
Randy Utterback: mandolin
John Michel: drums


LOVE'S REWARD
(“Love is metaphysical gravity.” R. Buckminster Fuller)

Sometimes I spend all my time making money
Then I spend a lot of money trying to buy a little more time
Always something different we are looking for
One thing I know -- love is its own reward

Out on the road sometimes I long to stay in one place
When I'm home I start to wishing to be any other where
Always something different we are looking for
One thing I know -- love is its own reward

Love can move the mountains
It works like gravity
Bringing things together like you and me

Sometimes I look for the one to make me happy
Then I look for all the reasons why you're not the perfect one
Always something different we are looking for
One thing I know -- love is its own reward

Some times are hard
That's just the way it goes
Good times in hard times...love will make it so

For all the times that I wish my life were different
If I can just keep my heart open I can end this private war
Always something different we are looking for
One thing I know -- love is its own reward
Always something different when love comes through the door
One thing I know -- love is its own reward




Ellen: guitar, vocal
Smokin’ Joe Kelly: acoustic and electric guitars, bass, bandoneon, harmony vocal
Randy Utterback: fiddle
Sarah Stevens: harmony vocal
John Michel: drums


AT MY DADDY'S SIDE
(A fond remembrance of standing on the hump in the backseat of the
old green Plymouth, leaning over Daddy’s shoulder as we went exploring)

When I was young my daddy’d drive me around
Pretend to get lost in some new part of town
He’d say, “My girl, you’ve got to help me
I don’t know where we are
You’ll have to find our way home”
And I’d laugh and feel so special
Though I knew that he was fooling
I felt safe and oh so smart at my daddy’s side

I learned to love the road at my daddy’s side
Learned to love adventure on those afternoon rides
Now I keep on moving, even when I don’t know where
‘Cause I know that I’ll know when I get there

We’d put pennies on the railroad track
Sometimes nickels or even a dime
He’d say, “My girl, stand back and listen
You can hear that engine whine
The Daylight, she always runs on time”
And we’d wave to the engineer and count the clacking cars
I felt safe and oh so bold on my daddy’s arm

I learned to love the road at my daddy’s side
Learned to love adventure on those afternoon rides
Now I keep on moving, even when I don’t know where
‘Cause I know that I’ll know when I get there

The orchards are long gone from that Southern California time
When the nights were heavenly perfume
Before he died my daddy blessed me with a gypsy bone
And sang to me a traveling tune

Now I’m grown up, though it rarely feels that way
And I’m always going somewhere and the days just slip away
I say, “My girl, you’ve got to wake up
You don’t know where we are
You’ll have to find our way home”
And I laugh to hear the echo of a voice from long ago
When I felt safe and oh so strong at someone’s side

I learned to love the road at my daddy’s side
Learned to love adventure on those afternoon rides
Now I keep on moving, even when I don’t know where
‘Cause I know that I’ll know when I get there
Daddy, I’ll find my way home


Ellen: guitar, vocal
Smokin’ Joe Kelly: guitar
JD Martin: vocal
Bobby Mason: harmonica


Hold Me CloseGENERATIONS

I never had a daughter from this body
But when I look at you
Such tenderness is in my breast
I want to make things safe for you
When I hear you sing and laugh
I know that I must clear a path
And gather wildflowers on the way
And give them all to you

I never had a son from this body
But when I look at you
Such a start hits my heart
I want to make a place for you
To live your dreams and walk with fire
Have the things that you require
To grow into a loving man
I want this all for you

I never had children from this body
But when I look at you
You give meaning to my words
And strength to do what I must do
So you have good clean earth to walk upon
Air to breathe and love so strong
That it will last your whole life long
I want this all for you

I never had a daughter from this body
Never had sons from this body
Never had children from this body
But somehow you are mine


GOOD ENOUGH

Well, I’ll never be good enough…and who’s to say when I’ve stood enough
‘Cause I’ll never be good enough for you
Well, I’m drawing a line and I’m not going to let you cross it
I’m going to find out for myself what’s good enough

And I’ll never be strong enough…I start to cry and it makes you afraid
That I’ll never be strong enough for you
Well I’m standing up tall, tears are running down my face
And I’m feeling it all and that feels strong

Well, I’ll never be nice enough…and bad girls lose a chance to be loved
No, I’ll never be nice enough for you
Well, I’m speaking my mind and you might not like what you’re gonna hear
I’m not being unkind…I’m not just a nice girl

You’re not the one to define me
Though I bought those rules a long time ago
I’m breaking them now, one by one
I’m gonna find out what is real

‘Cause I’ll never be good enough
And I’ll never be strong enough
And I’ll never be nice enough for you

No, I might never be nice enough
But I’ll try to be strong enough
I’m gonna find out what is good enough for me


Ellen: guitar, vocal
Smokin’ Joe Kelly: classical guitar, bass, castanets
Bobby Mason: electric guitar, harmony vocal
Bryan Savage: flute
John Michel: drums, shakers


ONE MOMENT MORE

All the things that I took for granted
Are slipping away from me now
Time’s getting short, words getting few
I’ll get by but I don’t know how

And the train’s pulling out of the station
What has this fighting been for?
Now I think of everything I’d say
If I had one moment more

All the things that I thought important
Are like weeds in the wind blowing by
I was sure I was right, I dug in for the fight
Now I’ve got nothing but wondering why

All the reasons made beautiful logic
And they kept me away from my fears
That I’d love and I’d lose and the scar and the bruise
Would never heal if I let you near

And the train’s pulling out of the station
What has this fighting been for?
Now I think of everything I’d say
If I had one moment more
Just one moment more

All the questions I’m longing to ask you
All the answers I never could hear
Are alive in my dreams till sometimes it seems
That I could never hold you more dear

And the train’s pulling out of the station
What has this fighting been for?
Now I think of everything I’d say
If I had one moment more
Just one moment more
Just one moment more…


Ellen: guitar, vocals
Smokin’ Joe Kelly: guitar, bass
Randy Utterback: dobro, mandolin, fiddle
John Sommers: banjo
John Michel: drums


COME BACK HOME

Come back home, you’ve been away too long
Come back home, you don’t have to be strong
You can lie back in my arms and drift away
Come back home for as long as you can stay

There was a man who gave to me the skies
All of the stars were reflected in his eyes
He said, “Let me show to you just how wonderful you are”
He touched my face and left another scar

Come back home, you’ve been away too long
Come back home, you don’t have to be strong
You can lie back in my arms and drift away
Come back home for as long as you can stay

There was a night when the world seemed to sing
Must have been the devil telling me I could have anything
And I let my hunger show for a lover just for me
It was a foolish thing to think that this might be

Come back home…

All of these days go rolling by so fast
In every moment there is something that will last
And there’s nothing you can do to stop me loving you
This is my choice, this is what I do

Come back home, you’ve been away too long
Come back home, you don’t have to be strong
You can lie back in my arms and drift away
Come back home for as long as you can stay
Come back home for as long as you can stay

Ellen: vocal
Smokin’ Joe Kelly: guitar
JD Martin: piano
Marcia Fisher: cello
Bill Capps: cello



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